Notes from Jonny B. Swift: Feb. 27, 2014

Dear Readers,

We live in tumultuous times. I don’t know if you’ve heard, but those heathens at Eastern Nazarene University can dance now. The fall of Wheaton a few years ago was bad enough, but these are Wesleyans! They had a choice in the matter!

So I commend Olivet for standing strong in the face of adversity. And there’s no adversary worse than your own parent organization. But how do we fight the enemy within?

If the Alien movies have taught me anything, the only way to defeat the enemy within is to jump into a vat of molten metal in a future space prison before the cultic inmates turn on each other. And if there’s one thing we know in the Nazarene bubble, its cults.

Readers, we all know the Nazarene church has changed its views on dancing. From entirely bad, to only choreographed, to the current understanding. According to the Nazarene manual, section 34, article 4, dancing is totally permitted. Kind of.

See, the section 34 deals with “Entertainments that are subversive to the Christian Ethic.” After debunking gambling and freemasonry (the surge of the modern era), the banes of existence, it states “All forms of dancing that detract from spiritual growth and break down proper moral inhibitions and reserve.” For those of you keeping score at home, dancing is allowed, but not the freemasonry gambling kind.

This is a part of our tradition, grounded in the words of Jesus Himself. Who could forget in Matthew 22:36-39, the command to love God and others? And clearly loving others means dancing at school cannot be permitted! Don’t believe me? Then check your manual. That’s the very passage used to support it.

So thank you, Olivet, for putting the fun back in fundamental. The naysayers may point to obscure verses like Exodus 15.20 or Jeremiah 31.13, but you have the guts to stand by your convictions.

Because if we ignore the problem, it might just go away.

Firmly planted – Logan Long

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